NEWSFLASH!

[zBret]

This just in... details are still sketchy, but we now have a confirmed report, from an unconfirmed source, that Ghosty ( who is one of our best "undercover" operatives btw) has just made good his escape from the isle of doom. Our source tells us that Ghosty, apparently made his escape in the wee hours of the morning, tip-toeing out of the compound wearing a pink bath robe with matching fuzzy slippers. He then promptly stuffed himself into an oversize caviar tin and mailed himself back to the UK.
(postage due of course). His fate, now rests in the hands of, the Royal Mail.

zBret

[johnboy]

His fate, now rests in the hands of, the Royal Mail.

zBret

Let's hope it's not a "Return to Sender"

[Ewan]

His fate, now rests in the hands of, the Royal Mail.

zBret

Let's hope it's not a "Return to Sender"

It's GHOSTY - it'll undoubtedly be First Class all the way old chap!

[GHOSTHUNTER]

ADVERTISMENT

ARE YOU TIRED OF ALL THOSE BORING LITTLE TOY CARS, FED UP WITH LOOKING AT THE SAME OLD REVERSE COLOUR WRECKERS AND CREAM MERCURY COUGERS, FED UP WITH STRANGERS COMING TO YOUR DOOR OFFERING YOU LARGE SUMS OF MONEY FOR THEM, WELL...YOU NEED "HAMMERMAN", WITH ONE SINGLE STRIKE WITH HIS HARDENED HAMMER, HE WILL RID YOU OF ALL THOSE ANNOYING MODELS, YOUR HOUSE WILL ONCE AGAIN BE ROOMY AND TIDY, GIVE US A CALL NOW, ON...0800 HAMMERMAN,EXT 7823.

SATISFACTION GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK, BUT NOT YOUR MODELS.

[motorman]

You've nailed it Ghosty!!!

[GHOSTHUNTER]

We have been receiving reports of a lone 'Pub Mirror' is pining for company.

The story comes from a reliable source close to the forum department of the 'V B D Times' and mentions the 'Mirror' has become very lonely due to the fact it is unique, no other Mirrors of his type are known. The owner who tends to the Mirror on a daily basis, says there are no markings on the back, but it seems to always be mimicking a model car, something we thought was unique to the Kameleon Animal, making it very difficult to know if its Male or Female.

The owner (who wants to remain anonymous), is asking for someone to come forward with a partner and the sex problem will be tackled when the two are together.

So please, if you have one of these 'Pub Mirrors' pretending to be a model car, looking to mate or at least see another member of its kind, leave a message on our answer phone on the usual number.

Now the Weather in your area.

[motorman]

JUST IN .....REPORTS ARE COMING IN FROM A REMOTE AUSTRIAN VILLAGE OF LOCALS BEING AWOKEN BY THE SOUNDS OF A GROWN MAN WAILING AND CRYING AND MAKING THE FOLLOWING CONTINUAL HEART WRENCHING PLEA.....

"MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL WHO IS THE FAIREST OF THEM ALL???.......PLEASE ANSWER ME MIRROR.....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE......I BEG OF YOU PLEASE!!!!!"

VILLAGE LOCALS HAVE CONTACTED COPS IN THE NEXT BIG TOWN WHO HAVE BEEN CONDUCTING AN EXTENSIVE SEARCH TO LOCATE THE SOURCE OF THE CONSTANT CRYING, BUT FACE A DIFFFICULT TASK DUE TO THE CONSTANT ECHOING COMING FROM THE SURROUNDING MOUNTAINS. THEY HAVE THUS FAR BEEN UNABLE TO PIN POINT EXACTLY WHERE THE ANGUISHED CRY'S ARE COMING FROM.......LATEST REPORTS SUGGEST THE CRY'S ARE GETTING WEAKER AND LOCAL PEOPLE ARE NOW VERY CONCERNED FOR THE UNKNOWN SUFFERERS WELL BEING....... THE LOCAL PRIEST HAS CALLED ALL TO ATTEND A MIDNIGHT SERVICE TO PRAY FOR HIS SOUL.

AND NOW THE TRAVEL REPORT.....

[GHOSTHUNTER]

The 'VBD Times' has an announcement, it is to open a Library. Due to pressure from some of it's readers, we have decided to offer this service hoping certain readers with spelling problems can make use of some of our books. Once you have joined you will receive your members card giving you the chance to come into our offices and choose any book or books of your choice, return them in the given time allowance and no penalty will be charged, but even if you don't, it is only a small charge.

To start our service there are some exclusive books we have specially brought in with such titles as...

"Matchboxdom and how to find your way around models"
"Scarceness" how to describe a rare model"
and a favourite allready..."Semetrical" the history of non-permenant tricals.

Details on how to join are at the usual place on our editorship page.

Now the weather in your area...

[GHOSTHUNTER]

Its the season of goodwill, not only have we just announced our Library service (see the notice above), but we now here of a 'VBD Times' subsidised charity where upon you can get free models.

All you need to do is subscribe to the Tjlglass instigated... "Free models for U"...Charity and you will receive a certificate and Toy Fair events listing showing where you can get your free models.

All you need to do at one of those listed events is go up to the stall holder (always identifiable because of his base ball cap), and say..."hello Tim, I collect model cars and these are my two sons"...that's it, so what are you waiting for! see the full details on our editorship page.

Today's weather is hot.

[GHOSTHUNTER]

Is This You! Do you suffer from "Numitis" does your head get stuck on one side!

Is This You!.jpg (52.89 KiB) Viewed 883 times

THEN YOU NEED THE SPECIAL 'VBD TIMES' SOOTHING MUSIC CD. THIS WILL RELAX YOU AND TAKE YOU AWAY FROM LIFE'S ROUGHNESS AND HARSHNESS. TRACKS INCLUDE...
"OH LORD WON'T YOU BUY ME, A MATCHBOX MERCEDES-BENZ".
"MATCHBOX MUSTANG SALLY".
"WHO'S MATCHBOX CADILLAC IS THAT".
and many more.

Just 27 Euros with our money back guarantee.

Send your Pay-Pal money order to our usual editorship address on the back page.